To Be Or Not To Be Humble

By Cheryl Hansen

It’s easy to spot a well-practiced yogi: She has pretty posture—long but not rigid. Her eyes sparkle as if she has a secret. And she moves with the fluidity of a bird in flight. In short, she’s confident.

My 6-year-old daughter has been told a few too many times that she’s cute. She IS cute—a smiley little girl who’s lost her two front teeth—but the adjective begins to fade a bit when you realize she knows it—and worse, leans into it (versus her brain). So the other day we had a conversation about being humble. While I believe the lesson is important for her right now, I promised myself to build on it moving forward. I don’t want her to confuse being humble with putting herself down. A lot of women I know (myself included) have a bad habit of being self-deprecating in a weird effort to be accepted among peers. “You like this jacket? I’m not sure it’s my color.” I want my daughter to have confidence and positive self-talk now and throughout her life. Shoot. I want me to have confidence and positive self-talk. Now is a good time to start, too, since I’m trying to transform and all. I shall make a list of positive attributes … about me. Really.

SIDE NOTE: This isn’t easy, by the way, because we’ve been taught (since we were 6?) not to brag. Now that I’ve successfully prefaced all that’s about to come just in case you think badly of me, here goes:

• I’m resourceful. I like to use creativity to solve problems. I’m not shy about tapping multiple sources and going at a challenge from multiple directions.
• I have a good smile.
• I have good instincts. My gut has an excellent record of being right (even when I’ve chosen not to listen).
• I give good hugs—the kind that include a mini backrub if time allows.
• I’m healthy.
• I’m a good student, particularly when it comes to writing. I still use algebra in my day-to-day life.
• I’m determined.
• I’m a good mom who thinks about how today’s lessons will translate tomorrow.

I think that’s a good, honest start. And upon review, it seems I have everything I need to be successful at this transformation, too. Is that confidence I’m feeling?

Now go make your own list. About you. Really.